Sovereign Grace

From Gospel Translations

Sovereign Grace and the Glorious Mystery of Election

He chose us in him before the foundation of the world — Ephesians 1:4

C.J. Mahaney

First Impressions

Author James Cantelon presents this moving and insightful remembrance of his conversion experience:

“First impressions are lasting impressions.” So goes the old saying, and I suspect in most cases it is true. My first impression of God is with me to this day. It happened at a musty old church camp in Central Saskatchewan, Canada. I was five years old.

Back in those days we were into tabernacles. Not only were most of our churches called tabernacles, but our camp meeting buildings were also given this Old Testament name for tent. On one especially hot day my parents were in the adult tabernacle and I, with my fellow junior campers, was in the children’s tabernacle. The teacher was tak- ing us through Bunyan’s Pilgrim’s Progress. As she taught, something sparked within me.

After the lesson the children exploded into the sunshine to play. I lingered. Miss Brown seemed to know why.

“Can I help you, Jimmy?” she asked gently. I nodded dumbly, bit- ing my suddenly trembling lower lip, tears welling in my eyes.

“Let’s go into the back room and pray,” she said. I can’t explain what happened....But I will say this: at age five I suddenly felt as though I were the worst sinner who had ever lived. My sense of sin nearly crushed my little heart. The prayer, however, had not ended. It began with remorse, it grew into joy. I felt this newly discovered bur- den lift from my fragile soul. The presence of God overwhelmed me. Without my looking for him, or asking for him—indeed, without any knowledge of my need of him—God came looking for me, asking for me...a five-year-old kid.^[1]

First impressions are indeed lasting impressions. Mr. Cantelon’s description of his conversion experience is revealing: “God came looking for me.” What is your understanding of your conversion experience? Who pursued whom? Did God come looking for you? Or does it seem that, in essence, you were pursuing God? What stands out the most to you: God’s initiative and intervention, or your repentance and faith?