A Pastor's Pride and Joy

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I am so proud of you,” said the pastor to his children. “You have done well for yourselves. I am so proud to be your father.” Contrast this statement with the words of another father addressed to his special son: “You are My beloved Son; in You I am well pleased” (Luke 3:22). Is there a difference?

I believe there is a world of difference. The pastor unwittingly is teaching his children that pride is good — “Your purpose in life is to make me a proud Papa.” But God commends the Lord Jesus Christ as one who has brought His Father joy — His chief end was and remains to glorify God and to enjoy Him forever.

Do you ever tell your children that they have made you proud? What comes out of your lips after the school play? Or after the goal in soccer? Or after the perfect pirouette in dance class? Does the “P” word ever slip in? This sort of language comes from cultural patterns of speech and thought uncritically taken into the vocabulary and thinking of those who ought to be the faithful. We say these things because, after all, we want our children to have a good self-image, don’t we?

Pastors say the same sorts of things to their other children — their spiritual pride and joy, the church. The apostle John loved this metaphor, referring frequently to his beloved people as “little children.” At one time I thought this was only a quaint and precious term of endearment, but now I see it as utterly descriptive. Why? Because churches are not cast as needful children; the people often act in harmony with this role. Too many Christians behave just like little ones in need of discipline, sometimes worse. Churches need to mature in their understanding of humility and the joy that comes therefrom. Yes, the joy that comes from humility as pride is put to death.

Pride ruins pastors and churches more than any other thing. It is more insidious in the church than radon in the home. Arrogant pastors moving along on the evangelical treadmill try to bring conceited (often cluelessly so) folk where they do not want to go. The irresistible force of self-worth meets the immovable object of “self-resolve.” The leader acts as though the ministry would be nothing without him and the parishioner muses how life was so much better before this particular shepherd came. Pride times pride compounds its force into a devastating wrecker of men’s souls. We have all seen it in action. Men don’t back down in humility to give gracious deference when needed. God’s Word is found true once again:“By pride comes nothing but strife, but with the well-advised is wisdom” (Prov. 13:10). Do you see strife? Pride is present somewhere. Our great need is wisdom when we see vanity’s face. Does not God promise this wisdom from above to those who ask?

Men do not like to admit their faults, nor confess they are sinners. I am guilty on both accounts. But the sooner we admit and confess, the quicker we can deal with our pride.

The taxonomy of the problem looks like this: premise — all men are sinners. Upon further examination, we find that sinners fall into two more distinct classes: those who admit their sin and those who don’t. Those who admit themselves to be sinners fall into two more classes: those who do something about it and those who do not. It is only those who deal with their soul’s dire need truthfully before God who may make progress out of their sin. Only those who in humility admit their sin and see their need are not hypocrites. But these are rare birds in our day and age. They profess what is true and live in accord with their pronouncement. They admit they are sinners and cry to God for His grace that they might make progress out of their sin by God’s means. All the others are wearing masks of self-delusion.

Look at yourself. Do you seek to know and deal with your sin, or do you hide it? Consider these words from the book of wisdom, “He who covers his sins will not prosper, but whoever confesses and forsakes them will have mercy” (Prov. 28:13). People wonder why they see no spiritual vitality in their lives. They shouldn’t. Often they are hiding some pet sin they love when they should be forsaking that very thing unto its death. Mortification (the art of killing sin) is still a biblical idea. There are no secret sins. God knows all. This may surprise you, but you can’t fool an omniscient being. He knows what we treasure in our hearts and minds. That alone should humble us as sinners in need of his grace.

We need to expunge the desire for our pride to be tickled or to tickle the pride of others in any way. Tell your children you are happy with them when they show fruit unto godliness. Tell your students they bring you joy. Pastors, tell your sheep it is all right to admit that they are sinners in need of grace. Then exhort them toward Christ’s mercy, which is able to humble and instruct our haughty hearts. It is the way of the wise. “When pride comes, then comes shame; but with the humble is wisdom” (Prov. 11:2).

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